Nonviolent Communication (NVC)

Don’t take anything personally.

The second agreement of Don Miguel Ruiz’s masterpiece, “The Four Agreements”.

That one agreement that I’ve struggled with the most. Maybe because it’s a negative – it tells you what not to do but leaves you wondering what to do.

Recently a Czech blogger (Táta parťák) pointed out a connection between this particular agreement and nonviolent communication (NVC) in his post. He demostrated how he communicated with a guy who left a comment full of hate using NVC. How the whole conversation shifted – it was ‘miraculous’ and I found it very inspiring.

Under that same post I found a recommendation for a video – a recording of a NVC workshop led by Marshall Rosenberg. 3 hours long, with English/Slovak subtitles.

I’ve been to a couple NVC workshops, I know the basic principles but I’ve never really succeeded to implement them into my daily life. I have a strong feeling this might change after watching this video. Seeing Marshall communicate with the audience, helping each of them understand what NVC is about; teaching them how to observe without evaluation and judgment, distinguish feelings and needs, make requests and not demands and how to express genuine gratitude and say thank you in Giraffe (the language of NVC).

Take the time and watch it. It’s really worth it.

If you need more motivation, check out some of the youtube comments:

“This content is some of the most powerful life changing stuff in the world.”

Three things I learned hanging out with Marshall today:

1) even if you do nvc “wrong” if your intention is to genuinely understand their needs, people will recognize that and be more open to hearing yours.

2) “don’t mistake the word non violent to be nice” nice overlooks, accommodates, pleases. non violence addresses and confronts with kindness.

3) cardinal rule: never put your “but” in the face of an angry person.”

“I love listening to Marshall. I feel it is ones the best gifts my friend gave to me. She introduced him to my life.. there is so much to learn from this complex yet simple and beautiful talk..thank you for sharing 🌷”

 

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